tonybaldwin | blog

non compos mentis

Vampires were people, too…

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The American Vampire League is the largest organization in the United States dedicated to promoting the equality and civil liberties of vampires. The AVL takes a three-pronged approach: lobbying for the Vampire Rights Act at state and national levels, disseminating accurate information about vampires to the general public and offering guidance to vampires seeking to mainstream…


So, here’s what I think.
The AVL says that, with the advent of “TruBlood”, a synthetic nutritive substance that can effectively replace real human blood, from living…sources, shall we say, that Vampires should now be welcomed into mainstream society, and their rights protected by the constitution against various forms of discrimination, etc.
That would be kind of like cows letting me be part of their society.
Sure. I can eat soybean tofu dogs and veggie burgers and all that crap, but, I’m sorry…I want real meat,
and, sooner or later, I’m going to butcher a neighbor and have a nice juicy cut of prime rib.
The neighbors kids? Mmmmmm…..veal parmesan.
Do you think for one minute that I believe these Vampire creEps don’t want to bite my neck?
Forget about it. I don’t trust them any more than I would trust myself in a cow community.
Call me vampophobic if you want.
I don’t care.
I don’t want those bastards living on my street; I don’t want their children in school with my child.
And what about public restrooms?
If I use the same toilet as one of these monstrosities, what are the chances of becoming infected?
I don’t know…


Written by tonybaldwin

July 24, 2008 at 10:36 am

Posted in politics

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